Yelp Jail Reviews: 10 Reviews From the Inmates Behind Bars

Published:4:15 pm EDT, April 29, 2013| Updated:6:35 pm EDT, April 29, 2013|
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Yelp is out of control with its user reviews. Not just limited to restaurants and movie theaters, people can also get a glimpse into how popular jail cells are thanks to first hand accounts from those behind bars.

Granted, most of the reviews are generally negative. It's jail though, you're not supposed to enjoy it. The Washington Post reports that lawyers have even used the reviews to help build their client's cases against any mistreatment suffered while incarcerated. Check out some of the "best" big houses on Yelp, straight from the jailbird's mouth.

Riker's Island: New York City, NY

prison reviews on yelp

View of the bay, worldly cuisine, attentive service - sounds like paradise. You know, except for that whole imprisonment aspect.


DC Jail: Washington, D.C.

prison reviews on yelp

Lunch for a buck fifty is a pretty sweet deal. Just remember not to make eye contact in the mess hall unless you want to be eating those mashed potatoes through a straw.


Riker's Island: New York City, NY

prison reviews on yelp

Not getting strip searched always garners an extra star on any jail review.


DC Jail: Washington, D.C.

prison reviews on yelp

The last line pretty much sums up the public's concern for inmates.


Alameda County Santa Rita Jail: Dublin, CA

prison reviews on yelp

Three stars... says the guy who didn't actually have to spend the night there.


Alameda County Santa Rita Jail: Dublin, CA

prison reviews on yelp

Hmm, Ted S. above must have overlooked the part about "anus shredding pals."


Tent City Jail: Phoenix, AZ

tent city

"You would have to drag me here in cuffs to get me to return." That's normally how it works, Daniel B.


San Francisco County Jail: San Francisco, CA

prison reviews on yelp

The horrible food and rude guards is to be expected. But the repeated pants crapping, now that's just uncalled for!


San Francisco County Jail: San Francisco, CA

sf jail

I'm not entirely sure Andrew J. understands the concept of jail at all.


Rikers Island: New York City, NY
prison reviews on yelp

Parenting tip, if you want your kid to stop wearing that stupid looking earring, just send him to prison.

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