A woman charged with killing a man by jamming a needle in his penis and pumping it full of silicone was in a New Jersey court this week pleading her innocence.
Come on, Kasia Rivera. Don't you know that silicone belongs inside your breasts, lips and butt, not injected directly into some dude's junk?
The 35-year-old apparently fancies herself some sort of medical expert, specializing in dong enlargement, but she has no training. And 22-year-old Justin Street found out the hard way.
He showed up with some buddies for a Pumping Party at Kasia's apartment in East Orange, New Jersey, responding to a flier she printed up.
When she fluffed his member with her patented pumping action, the chemical entered his bloodstream (dicks are full of blood, you know) and killed the poor bastard. He had a "silicone embolism."
Now his two kids will grow up without a dad. Sad. But at least his gene pool won't be further distributed.
Kasia pleaded not guilty to reckless manslaughter. She faces up to 10 years.