Oh, celebrities: they suck, yet we can't stop thinking about them. But who is truly the world's most worthless celebrity? Here at Heavy, we use science to answer these questions. Using a complex series of algorithms that monitor blog mentions, videos, and other Internet and media traffic, we have distilled the world's celebrities into an orderly list of 100 attention-seeking douchebags. Every day, we'll debut another entry on the list, counting down to the ultimate celebrity trainwreck.
Today's trainwreck seemed so normal at first - a 1980s star who broke through playing gentle rebels, his trademark squint and smile and immense personal charisma quickly earning him starring roles in huge movies. But as he aged, he started to spin off course, most notably through his activities in one of Hollywood's most notorious cults. Unlike others who just dabble in extracurricular religious activities, this guy takes it to the limit, espousing his church's doctrine that psychology is a "Nazi science" and that space aliens are real. Throw in a bizarre, out of the blue marriage and spawning with a much younger actress and some intensely weird public behavior and you have the actor who most Americans would not want as their best friend, according to a 2006 survey. Who's the trainwreck?
Tom Cruise is the man, gentle readers. Have you ever seen an actor go from America's sweetheart to America's crazy uncle in so little time? Following the doctrines of Scientology, the bizarre alien-fearing brain cult created by sci-fi writer and pedophile L. Ron Hubbard, Cruise has become the public spokesman for a group that is one of the most paranoid organizations in the world. After firing his long-time publicist in 2006, Cruise's public behavior rapidly spiraled out of control, from jumping on Oprah's couch in terrifying joy over his new child bride to the intense leaked Scientology video where a wild-eyed Cruise espouses the religion. With Katie Holmes supposedly pregnant with child #2, is Cruise raising a clone army to conquer the world and eliminate all Suppressive Persons? I'll bet he is! Here's the Cruise video that started it all.
