Sports

The 2012 London Olympics are a hotbed of debauchery and fornication. Regardless of what country you hail from or what sport you’re competing in, the real and amorous action happen…

I know you’re going to say no. There’s no way your school, a paragon of excellence and morality, could every possibly be the next Penn State. Except for where it could.

Truth be told, she has about 11 million creepers. What can we say, Michelle, the Internet loves a flexible girl and bad ’80s music.

The NCAA came down HARD on Penn State in the Sandusky/Paterno child rape scandal coverup, fining the school $60 million and vacating Paterno’s wins back to 1998.

With Penn State’s removal of the Joe Paterno statue, this evil fraud joins the ranks of other iconic figures whose likenesses were toppled throughout history.

Michelle Jenneke has a strange and flirty pre-race routine that, when paired with cheesy ’80s music, strokes a pleasure zone in my brain that I never knew I had.

Remember when Roger Clemens hurled a broken bat toward Mike Piazza in the 2000 World Series? Roid Rage! According to Pizza’s hot Playmate wife.

Dez Bryant (of the Dallas Cowboys) was arrested for Class A Family Violence. He slapped his mom in the face. Then he pulled her hair and her clothes and bra. That s&%t ain’t ri…

Paterno alma mater Brown made an obvious decision to distance an accomplice to molestation from an award for young men.

When the Kiss Cam gave him a second chance, Obama planted one on the First Lady like a teenager in a movie theater.

Another millionaire sports star, another arrest for uncontrolled behavior.

An insane otter bit a Minnesota triathlete woman 25 times in a bizarre lake attack. It goes to show that exercise is dangerous and should be avoided.

These once-poignant bits of JoePa wisdom just don’t seem the same.