Opinion

  1. 4 Reasons I Hate the Super Bowl But Will Watch it Anyway

    What a dumb thing I wouldn’t miss for the world.

    February 1, 2013
  2. 6 Reasons North Korea is More Sad than Scary, Including Cannibalism

    We’re all terrified of being nuked, but North Korea is more worthy of our pity than our fear.

    January 28, 2013
  3. OPINION: 4 Reasons Why J.J. Abrams is Wrong for Star Wars

    J.J. Abrams isn’t a bad choice to direct Star Wars Episode VII, but he’s the wrong choice. Fins out why inside.

    January 26, 2013
  4. 5 People Accidentally Shot at Gun Shows on Gun Appreciation Day

    Maybe having a special day to love your guns right before a holiday for a man who was killed by one was not the greatest idea.

    January 19, 2013
  5. Can a $1 Trillion Coin Really Save The American Economy?

    Why, yes, Mr. Bond, I do intend to steal this trillion dollar platinum coin …. AND THEN THE WORLD SHALL BE MINE! MUWAHAHAHAHA!

    January 5, 2013
  6. OPINION: Don’t Blame the DJs for Jacintha Saldanha’s Suicide!

    Why are two radio DJs being held accountable for something they’re only tangentially related to?

    December 8, 2012
  7. Can Republicans Become the Party of Copyright Reform? **UPDATED**

    The Republican Study Committee released a policy brief on copyright law reform and … it makes total sense? Holy crap!

    November 17, 2012
  8. New York District Attorney, Mark Suben, Has Porn Past

    The most offensive part of the videos is … well .. the body hair. It’s scarring. I’ll never look at thickets the same way again.

    November 17, 2012
  9. Why the San Francisco Giants Should Let Melky Cabrera Play in Series

    In the so called “post-steroids” era of baseball, where PED’s are generally frowned upon by the commish, one of the Giant’s best players will not be in play come Tuesday evening. …

    October 24, 2012
  10. Like-A-Hug: Wearable Social Media Vest For The Permanently Insecure

    Technology for those annoying days when you’re simultaneously chilly and desperate for a hug.

    October 8, 2012
  11. Rush Limbaugh Claims ‘Feminazis’ Are Shrinking Penises

    Rush Limbaugh apparently believes that concepts can harm your penis. Sounds like someone’s makes excuses.

    September 20, 2012
  12. Mayor Bloomberg is Taking Away Your Soda, Fatty!

    Next Mayor Bloomberg will require all New Yorkers to wear diapers and after that he’ll start personally breastfeeding everyone in NYC.

    September 13, 2012
  13. Sadist James Dolan Wants to Torture Knicks Fans in Isiah Thomas Dungeo…

    Isiah Thomas is coming back to the Knicks. Ready your suicide katanas, Knicks fans, the good times have ended.

    September 10, 2012
  14. Could Hologram Jesus Be the RNC Mystery Speaker?

    The Republican National Convention has a mystery speaker. Let me get my House cane and try to figure out who it is.

    August 30, 2012
  15. New Jersey Aims to Outlaw Dogs’ Happiness

    New Jersey is trying to outlaw dogs sticking their heads out the window. Clearly the most pressing issue of our time.

    August 30, 2012