Movies

  1. Full Release: Movies

    In theaters this week, it’s Black vs White as Tyler Perry’s Madea gets lost in the Antarctic wasteland. Or maybe I got a little bit confused. Here’s my take on the new flicks hitti…

    September 11, 2009
  2. Worst of Netflix: Tomcat Angels

    Every two weeks, I put a movie in my Netflix queue that’s rated at one star. This is no easy task, as even a piece of cinema failure like Gigli is rated at one and a half stars. Bu…

    September 10, 2009
  3. Full Release: Movies

    New movies hit theaters today, as they do every Friday. It’s time to start hitting back.Extract – Mike Judge tries to recover from the disaster that was Idiocracy with a new flick …

    September 4, 2009
  4. Stop It, Hollywood: Diddling Around When The Cops Are Talking

    Certain things have become so overused in movies and television that they’ve actually transcended being clichés to become parodies of clichés, which is just all sorts…

    September 2, 2009
  5. Lots Of Pictures Of Megan Fox

    So Megan Fox is in this movie called Jennifer’s Body. She plays Jennifer, so basically the movie is called Megan Fox’s Body. I don’t know anything about the movie except for what I…

    August 30, 2009
  6. Law Abiding Citizen Trailer

    Clyde Shelton (Gerard Butler) is an upstanding family man whose wife and daughter are brutally murdered during a home invasion. When the killers are caught, Nick Rice (Jamie Foxx),…

    August 27, 2009
  7. Three Frames Of Epileptic Joygasm

    How awesome is Three Frames? Using the simplest of Internet technology, the animated GIF, they re-invent old movies into stuttering, epileptic joygasms. A daily must-see for sheezy…

    August 27, 2009
  8. Arnold’s Big Sword

    Do you think visitors to Arnold Schwarzenegger’s office in Sacramento get a little freaked out when they see that he has the sword from Conan The Barbarian on prominent display? Th…

    August 27, 2009
  9. RAMPAGE TO THE BIG SCREEN

    In the world of mixed marital arts, few fighters have the charisma of Quinton “Rampage” Jackson. The Memphis-born fighter rose to the top of the Pride ranks with a brutal, physical…

    August 26, 2009
  10. 6 G.I. Joes That Need To Be In The Sequel

    What with the Summer of Hasbro coming to an end, it’s a no-brainer that G.I. Joe: The Rise Of Cobra (which has pulled in some $236 million as of press time) is getting a sequel. Th…

    August 26, 2009
  11. Worst Of Netflix: Splatter Rampage Wrestling

    Every two weeks, I put a movie in my Netflix queue that’s rated at one star. This week: Splatter Rampage Wrestling, starring a bunch of teenage hillbillies and a lot of flaming ply…

    August 24, 2009
  12. Cimenashing Carrie

    Holy crap, is Will Arnett in Cinemash’s version of Carrie like the best thing ever? Don’t answer that. It is.

    August 18, 2009
  13. Shake Dat Ass

    I don’t know if there’s anything in this poor dumb world I like more than movie theater gimmicks. We’ve seen a recent upswing in 3-D lately, but now moviemakers are getting ready t…

    August 17, 2009
  14. Bigscreen Battlestar Gallatica

    Can you squeeze blood from a Cylon? Universal Studios sure can – despite Battlestar Galactica coming to a close earlier this year, the studio is intent on trotting the franchise ou…

    August 14, 2009
  15. G.I. Joe Director: Critics Remind Me Of My Mother

    Oh, Stephen Sommers, you monolithic hack. The Summer of Hasbro reached a crescendo with the enormous opening weekend for your action figure fantasia G.I. Joe: The Rise Of Cobra, wh…

    August 13, 2009