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Tue, 09 Aug 2005 00:00:00 EDT

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SHOOT 'EM UP: Meet the Cast

Tue, 21 Aug 2007 11:06:48 EDT

Heavy News correspondent Sunday Mensah brings you interviews with the three stars of Shoot 'Em Up. In this informative segment: * Writer/director Michael Davis talks about the casting of the movie * Academy-Award nominated star Paul Giamatti ("Sideways", "Cinderella Man") talks about how the strangeness of the script and the animated action pitch sequences won him over * Sexy Italian actress Monica Bellucci talks about the depth of Shoot 'Em Up's three main characters, including her role as DQ, a hooker who happens to be lactating * Star Clive Owen ("Sin City") talks about the wittiness and originality of the script, and the amount of physical preparation that went into the role. * Plus see awesome action sequences and other great scenes from Shoot 'Em Up!

Bobby Freak's Nutcracker Suite

Thu, 02 Aug 2007 11:03:06 EDT

Bobby "Badass Mofo Stuntman" Freak and his totally fly gold braid necklace show you how NOT to perform certain stunts. Including: * A skater who's one ramp short of a full stunt * A gruesome landing from a rooftop jump * Skaters and bikers going from the staircase to the rail, in a ballsy fashion Then, learn how to do it right with Stuntman Extraordinare Hot Rod Kimble's daring leap of an upturned garbage can. Noice! CHANNEL DESCRIPTION Hey sports fans, if you ready to think outside the box scores, you are ready for BURLY SPORTS. Echoing "SportsCenter's" smug tone and snarky commentary, BURLY SPORTS, featuring host Nick Stevens, skips the usual sports highlights and turns all of the raciest, most controversial and most embarrassing moments from the world of baseball, basketball, football, hockey and all other sports into a one-of-a-kind low-light reel. Barry Bonds, A-Rod, steroids, the Red Sox, LeBron, the Stanley Cup, underage girl golfers, playboy model swimmers, fat fans, Eva Langoria and much more. All this, plus suspiciously edited interviews and some truly "special" correspondents (including the BS Bookie and Paul "Fitzy" Fitzgerald). When BURLY's calling the plays, everyone's a loser! For fans of "SportsCenter," "The Man Show", ESPN, NBA, MLB, NFL, NHL, NCAA ... dudes, basically.

Wheeeeee Horsey!

Tue, 07 Aug 2007 11:25:26 EDT

Nick Stevens and the Burly Sports crew grab their stack of lucky $2 bills and head to beautiful Belmont Park, NY, for a day of horse racing at the legendary track. Place your bets as Nick gets hot tips from these experts ... * Deb, a racing fan with a psychic connection to horses * Championship breeder Kiaran McLaughlin. Breeder of horses, not breeder of people. Kiaran and Nick Stevens discuss the process of naming a horse, and whether or not the "porn name" (pet name / street name) theory applies. * 2007 Belmont Stakes Champion (and 2004-2005 U.S. Champion Jockey title) jockey John Velazquez. Down the stretch they come! It's Win, Place, and Burly Sports Show!

BURLY SPORTS: Sex, Stunts and Rock and Roll!

Tue, 31 Jul 2007 11:24:38 EDT

Even a veteran stuntman like Stuntman Extraordinare and Special BURLY SPORTS correspondant Bobby Freak can tell you: you can only be so prepared for what the Big Guy Upstairs has in store for you. So, get your helmet and your cup and brace yourself for ... * Nut-wrecking rail rides! * Audience endagering motorcycle mishaps! Fans get down from the stands and into the action! * A stunt biker deciding at the last second he'd rather drive a truck ... with his face! * Explosive stunt action from "Hot Rod", starring Hot Rod Kimble!

BURLY SPORTS: In-Your-Face Stunt Insanity!

Fri, 27 Jul 2007 11:24:47 EDT

Wanna see some awesome stunt-car wreckage? Just let BURLY SPORTS Extreme Stunt Correspondant Bobby Freak get all up in your grill. Thanks to his 30 years of experience going cliff-diving in Camaros on "The Six Million Dollar Man" (starring Lee Majors), he can show you that ... * Pros can wreck just like amateurs. But they can also walk away with a sudden date with a retaining wall! * There ain't no rage like NASCAR road rage! Sweet fighting footage! * In cars, it's not about how high you fly, but how you land. * Hot Rod Kimble's Ice Cream Truck jump could use a little fine tuning. Remember: anyone can wreck a car, but only a stuntman can wreck a car AWESOMELY!

BURLY SPORTS: Bobby Freak's Stunt Spectacular!

Wed, 25 Jul 2007 16:25:00 EDT

Let a real stuntman show you what real bad stunts look like! Guest host Bobby Freak and Hot Rod Kimble show you the ropes. Not that they've ever needed ropes. * See! Car-crushing racing wrecks! * Feel! A bicycle-jumpers one-point landing! * Taste! The glass of a double decker bus! * Watch! The off-the-wall stunt insanity of Hot Rod Kimble from "Hot Rod!" This special edition of Burly Sports will stunt your growth!

GAME SLAP! Upgrade Your Entertainment Center

Fri, 20 Jul 2007 12:13:45 EDT

You ready to be a true gamer? The TRUE GAME HEADZ crew brings you tips, tricks, cheats, codes, reviews, skits and other nuttiness from the world of video games. Xbox, Wii, PS2 wielded by the realist gamers on the planet, the TRUE GAME HEADZ. Plus, gratuitous Lara Croft shots, interviews, and much more.

BURLY SPORTS: Not Playing with a Full Deck

Tue, 17 Jul 2007 16:34:06 EDT

Hey sports fans, if you ready to think outside the box scores, you are ready for BURLY SPORTS. Echoing "SportsCenter's" smug tone and snarky commentary, BURLY SPORTS, featuring host Nick Stevens, skips the usual sports highlights and turns all of the raciest, most controversial and most embarrassing moments from the world of baseball, basketball, football, hockey and all other sports into a one-of-a-kind low-light reel. Barry Bonds, A-Rod, steroids, the Red Sox, LeBron, the Stanley Cup, underage girl golfers, playboy model swimmers, fat fans, Eva Langoria and much more. All this, plus suspiciously edited interviews and some truly "special" correspondents (including the BS Bookie and Paul "Fitzy" Fitzgerald). When BURLY's calling the plays, everyone's a loser! For fans of "SportsCenter," "The Man Show", ESPN, NBA, MLB, NFL, NHL, NCAA ... dudes, basically.

BURLY SPORTS: Taste the Man-Fist!

Fri, 13 Jul 2007 15:38:00 EDT

GAME SLAP! Ninjas, Zombies and BOMBS!

Thu, 12 Jul 2007 16:16:45 EDT

BURLY SPORTS: Big Trouble in Little Milwaukee

Tue, 10 Jul 2007 12:40:06 EDT

Hey sports fans, if you ready to think outside the box scores, you are ready for BURLY SPORTS. Echoing "Sports Center's" smug tone and snarky commentary, BURLY SPORTS, featuring host Nick Stevens, skips the usual sports highlights and turns all of the raciest, most controversial and most embarrassing moments from the world of baseball, basketball, football, hockey and all other sports into a one-of-a-kind low-light reel. Barry Bonds, A-Rod, steroids, the Red Sox, LeBron, the Stanley Cup, underage girl golfers, playboy model swimmers, fat fans, Eva Langoria and much more. All this, plus suspiciously edited interviews and some truly "special" correspondents (including the BS Bookie and Paul "Fitzy" Fitzgerald). When BURLY's calling the plays, everyone's a loser! For fans of "SportsCenter," "The Man Show", ESPN, NBA, MLB, NFL, NHL, NCAA ... dudes, basically.

KR: The Superhero Next Door

Fri, 06 Jul 2007 18:56:16 EDT

Are you living next door to a Superhero? Hard-hitting People Expert Derrick Hicks goes to criminal lengths to expose the crime-fighters in our midst.

GAME SLAP! Live from BotCon 2007

Thu, 05 Jul 2007 15:54:29 EDT

The True Game Headz crew reports live from BotCon 2007 with reviews, interviews and bus-hurling beatdowns from "Transformers: The Movie: The Game." Is it more than meets the eye?

BURLY SPORTS: Three Cheers for America!

Tue, 03 Jul 2007 12:04:52 EDT

Mariner manager gives himself the hooker, Knicks dancers blow the whistle, and a fight of the ages with an ancient Evander Holyfield. Plus, your fantasy baseball team experiences statistical warming with Al Gore.

BURLY SPORTS: Can Wimbledon Get Any Wussier?

Fri, 29 Jun 2007 14:13:45 EDT

GAME SLAP! Live from Wii-mbledon

Wed, 27 Jun 2007 13:05:47 EDT

BURLY SPORTS: Jersey Sports Looking Hotter

Tue, 26 Jun 2007 13:59:23 EDT

BURLY SPORTS: Guns, Strippers, Fights and Cash

Fri, 22 Jun 2007 16:02:47 EDT

Golfers get ripped, the NFL gets gay, Beckham gets bent, "game over" for Pacman, and results from the NCAA mop finals.

BURLY SPORTS: Tiger Mrs. Crucial Putt

Tue, 19 Jun 2007 14:10:34 EDT

BURLY SPORTS: The Birthday-Suit Issue

Fri, 15 Jun 2007 12:06:36 EDT

GAME SLAP! Gaming Out of Control

Thu, 14 Jun 2007 12:11:38 EDT

ASSFACE: Don't Hate the Mayor, Hate the Game

Wed, 13 Jun 2007 16:51:25 EDT

Heavy puts a potty mouth on the soapbox as we bring you the rants and tirades of our political pundit AssFace. With the lower body of Ken (of Ken & Barbie fame), the mustache of Tom Selleck, and mouth of a sailor, AssFace is a Brooklyn construction worker and a Washington outsider tackling new political issues each week, from George W. Bush, to weapons of mass destruction, to the Democratic primaries, to the war in Iraq. Al Gore, Bill and Hillary Clinton, the environment, the war on terror, Republicans, gay governors, Barack Obama: nothing comes away clean from AssFace's smear campaigns!

BURLY SPORTS: Parker to the Hole ... DENIED!

Tue, 12 Jun 2007 12:13:33 EDT

BURLY SPORTS: Duncan Gonuts

Fri, 08 Jun 2007 13:28:03 EDT

BURLY SPORTS: LeBron, Gay-Rod, Underage Wie

Tue, 05 Jun 2007 11:45:15 EDT

ASSFACE: Putting the A*S Back in DiplomASSy

Wed, 06 Jun 2007 14:39:10 EDT

KR: Dogs, Friend or Foe?

Thu, 07 Jun 2007 10:54:37 EDT

With the advent of Wikipedia and other thus far-undiscovered distractions, the human mind is shrinking. The anticipated result, according to the Kensington Report: canine intelligence will surpass human intelligence. Get a harrowing glimpse inside a harrowing future where Earth is renamed Grogan and humans are made to fetch in outer space. To thwart this seemingly-inevitable scenario the US Government has sent a pentagon official to the UK in an attempt to dig up any potential weapons, or bones.

V-Fest Vancouver, Part I

Fri, 01 Jun 2007 16:16:28 EDT

Heavy News storms V-Fest Vancouver! Our international music correspondant Manuel interviews rockers Marianas Trench, some 15-year old girls and a hapless security guard. Rock!

V-Fest Vancouver, Part II

Fri, 01 Jun 2007 16:22:01 EDT

Heavy hits the jumbotron at V-Fest Vancouver! Our correspondant Manuel interviews the Reason, Andy and Pandy from Virgin, and a girl with really huge ... boots.

KR: Botswana: Botswana: Hidden Nuclear Threat

Thu, 31 May 2007 10:23:38 EDT

This week, Kensington Report attempts to tear the cover off of secret weapons-related activities no doubt taking place in the suspiciously dormant, AIDS-stricken African nation of Botswana. Though no evidence has turned up to support Botswana's weapons build-up, this has only helped to fuel anxieties about Botswana's intentions. Right-wing Rupert Murdoch inspired tabloid "Daily Freakout" reports that Botswana "wants to kill our children" in an effort to ramp up public approval for all-out war on this obscure nation of mud huts.

ASSFACE: Iraq, Iran, I-oughta-bomb-em-both

Wed, 30 May 2007 12:40:51 EDT

MTV Movie Awards - New York Style

Fri, 25 May 2007 22:34:44 EDT

Ricky Powell hits NYC and learns people's picks for the MTV Movie Awards from Borat to Deep Throat.

KR: Are Babies Controlled by Aliens?

Thu, 24 May 2007 10:18:22 EDT

A cure for cancer? Of course not, that's boring. The world's top scientists are now hard at work at cracking one of nature's most persistent mysteries: why are babies so irritating? One school of thought claims that they are controlled by aliens, as a way to distract humans and coax them into averting their attention downward, making them particularly vulnerable to a surprise invasion from above. For all they know, babies may even have chips in their head or something. Jackie Briggs reports.

ASSFACE: The AssFace Guide to the GOP

Wed, 23 May 2007 11:47:02 EDT

KR: Are Celebrities Superhuman?

Thu, 17 May 2007 10:19:09 EDT

This week, Kensington Report goes in depth with a recent study that shows celebrities are superior to the ordinary people. Though it has long been known that celebs and A-listers are more important and sexually potent than non-celebrities, new research shows they can also breathe underwater and withstand high temperatures. To illustrate the superhuman superiority of celebrities, a series of scientific tests are conducted with a normal London citizen and the singer of (fictitious) pop band Novacaine.

ASSFACE: McGov Totally Frocked

Wed, 16 May 2007 13:17:30 EDT

ASSFACE: An Inconvenient Deuce

Wed, 09 May 2007 12:33:50 EDT

ASSFACE: Privates Exposed!

Wed, 02 May 2007 15:38:11 EDT

TECHSMART: Size Matters

Wed, 02 May 2007 10:08:25 EDT

Ron Jeremy goes shopping for the world's largest HD TV (High Definition Television), hoping to find a store that will give him a celebrity discount. Thus, Ron Jeremy becomes the subject of his own hidden camera experiment, stopping by his local Best Buy location. The camera catches his interactions with a salesman named Alf, with whom he discusses unit sizes, in inches. It does not take long for Alf and his co-workers to recognize the world's most famous adult video star, assuring him that a generous celebrity discount will be his.

FROM ASHY TO CLASSY: Big Pamperin'

Tue, 01 May 2007 10:06:36 EDT

Ashford Lawrence has it made. Thanks to his appearances as "Ashy Larry" on Dave Chappelle's Chappelle's Show, Ashford Lawrence has enough money to get off his filthy couch in Brooklyn's Marcy Projects (also childhood home of Jay-Z) and start living like a rich man. Each week, Ashford Lawrence visits some of New York and Brooklyn's finest cultural landmarks. Fine food, fine cigars, fine art, fine wine, and all the comforts associated with upscale living all await the shirtless and completely uncouth Ashford Lawrence, a low-life trying to live the high life.

SPECIAL REPORT: 2007 New York Auto Show

Mon, 30 Apr 2007 17:11:18 EDT

"Pit in" with Heavy News correspondant Julie Alexandria as she talks cars with multi-talented Speed Stick spokesman Guy Mennen at the 2007 New York Auto Show.

TECHSMART: Guitar Hero Ron

Wed, 25 Apr 2007 10:38:41 EDT

Ron Jeremy shows how easy it is to become an Internet sensation simply by using a camcorder. Capitalizing on the popularity of viral video superstars such as the inept Afro Ninja, the notorious Indian Little Superstar, fake teen Lonelygirl15 and a Star Wars fan film, Ron Jeremy illustrates the money making possibilities of blogs and vlogs, funky topless dance moves, and light sabers, with his spoofs LonelyRon69, Star Wars Ron, Afro Ninja Ron and his take on Little Superstar. The result: four new videos in the canon of the world's most famous adult video star.

ASSFACE: Judge-Packers

Wed, 25 Apr 2007 10:35:26 EDT

FROM ASHY TO CLASSY: Ashford's Exotic Feast

Mon, 23 Apr 2007 18:24:01 EDT

ASSFACE: Facehole Politicos

Wed, 18 Apr 2007 13:43:07 EDT

TECHSMART: Ron Jeremy Stars In a New Kind of Video

Tue, 17 Apr 2007 18:35:26 EDT

It's the biggest thing to hit the Internet yet! Ron Jeremy goes from adult video star to viral video star with send-ups of the inept Afro Ninja, the notorious Indian Little Superstar, fake teen Lonelygirl15 and a Star Wars fan film. The result: four new videos in the canon of the world's most famous adult video star.

FROM ASHY TO CLASSY: Expose Yourself to Art

Mon, 16 Apr 2007 18:07:02 EDT

TECHSMART: When The Hybrid's Rockin' ...

Tue, 10 Apr 2007 17:08:56 EDT

Take a steamy ride in the backseat with Ron Jeremy, as he cruises for action in a hybrid car.

ASSFACE: Something Stinks on Capitol Hill

Thu, 12 Apr 2007 12:02:59 EDT