Obama’s Pick Will Put Stupid Scribbles on Every New Dollar Bill

jacob lew

Yesterday, it was reported that President Obama’s pick for Secretary of Treasury is Jacob J. Lew, his current chief of staff and former budget director.

If he’s confirmed, Lew’s signature will be seen on newly printed dollar bills. We get a pretty good idea of what his signature looks like from a White House memo from 2011 that he signed. And here’s what it looks like:

lew signature

Very professional. Like one of those crazy straws.

The Daily Mail had Sheila Lowe, a forensic handwriting analyst, take a look at his autograph.

“He doesn’t want us to see a lot about him…He doesn’t want people to see his private side,” she mused.

That, or he’s just a 6-year-old kid trying to forge his parents’ signature.

Obama then commented on Lew’s signature, saying that he has been assured that Lew “is going to work to make at least one letter legible in order not to debase our currency, should he be confirmed as secretary of the Treasury.” Obama, master of wit.