Oh, celebrities: they suck, yet we can't stop thinking about them. But who is truly the world's most worthless celebrity? Here at Heavy, we use science to answer these questions. Using a complex series of algorithms that monitor blog mentions, videos, and other Internet and media traffic, we have distilled the world's celebrities into an orderly list of 100 attention-seeking douchebags. Every day, we'll debut another entry on the list, counting down to the ultimate celebrity trainwreck.
If you were a mega-millionaire owner of one of the most successful entertainment franchises in the world, with hundreds of employees, multiple television programs and no responsibility to outside shareholders, what would you do with that power? Today's trainwreck uses it to force hot chicks to make out with him on live TV, fake his own death, and apparently do as many steroids as it takes to make a 64 year old man have the physique of a bodybuilder thirty years younger. Throw in sexual harassment lawsuits, an abusive childhood that featured putting crushed leaves in one of his cousin's hoo-has, and the recent news of his eldest son leaving the family business to work for the competition and you have a serious trainwreck. Who is it? Find out inside.
Yes, today's Trainwreck 100 inductee is Vince McMahon. The sole owner of the World Wrestling Federation inherited the business from his father and went on to make professional wrestling as American as apple pie on the backs of stars like Hulk Hogan. But behind the scenes, Vince was up to his ears in sleaze, from the absurd drug and steroid consumption of his wrestlers to allegedly helping cover up a murder or two. Vince crafted his backstage personality into the villainous on-screen "Mr McMahon," writing skits in which his employees were forced to kiss his bare ass in the middle of the ring, but soon it seemed like the lines between the two were blurring more every day. And how else do you explain his son Shane ditching the WWE to get in with the UFC, which stands to make sports entertainment obsolete? Vince has claimed that he's retiring from the ring, but if there's one thing I know about pro wrestling, it's that retirement lasts about fifteen minutes. Here's a great video of Vince flipping out on Armin Keteyian on Real Sports With Bryant Gumbel.
